Ask Isis     

 

Failure

 

Is failure bad? Does failing make you a failure?

 

These questions were asked in a class on Failure. Too often we internalize the fact that we failed at something and turn that failure into the words, “I am a Failure.” Are you really a failure or are you just feeling down because you didn’t succeed? Everyone has heard the story of Lincoln who failed every time he ran for office. It seemed that no matter what he did he couldn’t gain that coveted office. Did Lincoln believe he was a failure because he couldn’t win an election? Obviously he did not as he kept right on trying until he won the one election that counted. He became the 16^th President of the United States.

 

Some important men in history have stated that it was failing in something that caused them to become highly successful. If you win each time you try what do you learn?  It is through trial and error that you see what will work and what won’t.

When I became a salesperson I was told that only one out of every ten sales would close. Not closing the other nine didn’t make me a failure but it did help me to become a better salesperson as it showed me where I could do better. A story went around the office about a new sales person who couldn’t seem to close a sale. Did he get discouraged? Oh no, he just knew that when he reached his 90^th ‘no’ that the next 10 would be ‘yeses’. This salesman persevered through all the negativity and finally he became a top salesman in his company. 

 

If we listen to failure when it is speaking to us we will soon learn that failure is a great teacher. A young woman entered the Miss America contest for 3 years straight. On her third year she won the contest. When asked why she kept coming back even though she had failed for two years she answered that she had been learning. That learning helped her to win the title.

 

What have you learned through failing?

 

Fear

 

Along with Failing comes fear. Churchill once said, “The only thing you have to fear is fear itself”.

Too often the fear of failing is so strong that we don’t do anything. The way to succeed in everything is to never try anything that can cause you to fail. If someone speaks of a person who succeeds in everything that they do don’t be envious. Feel sorry for them. They haven’t stretched their muscles. In order to grow you need to fail. Failure allows you to try something new. Fear hobbles you and can keep you from ever reaching for the success that is yours.

 

                                    Control

A child has no control over their life. Have you given up control of yours? Giving up control in this context means that you are letting a fear of failure or a fear of what people will think hold you back. What is it you are afraid of? Is it fear of what people will think? Say that you always wanted to be a circus clown but your family is a family of lawyers and you are expected to join the family firm. Do you go to Law school or do you go to Clown school?

 

Do you have control of your life? Remember that it is your life. Only you can live it. What are you doing to make your dreams come true? Have you ever wondered, “What if?”

 

            Shakespeare said that, “all the world is a stage and the men and women merely players”. If the world is a stage and we are the players then it stands to reason that we are also our own scriptwriters. What kind of script are you writing?

One time I was driving an old car and the front vent window was missing. It began raining and the rain came into the car so that I was having vision problems. I remembered Shakespeare and thought, “If I am my own script writer then I’m writing a script that says that the rain stays outside the car.”  Maybe the wind changed but I can tell you that no more rain came into the car. It was a small dream but as it turned out a dry one. What is your dream? Do you have the courage to go after that dream or are you going to find yourself 10/15 years later bemoaning the fact that you let that dream get away? Will you succeed in that dream? It doesn’t matter. If you follow your dream you can say that you did so with pride. What will you say in the future if because of fears you never even attempt your dreams?

 

Isis has a small tractor. Isis has a dream of using that tractor to plow some land she owns to raise fruits and vegetables. That tractor has been inoperable for three years so she has had someone working on that tractor trying to fix it. Failure is not an option. Fear is not an option. Isis can ‘see’ her blueberries ripe and full on her bushes. The strawberries becoming plump and red. Isis can ‘see’ the watermelons and pumpkins ripening in the fields. For three years she ‘saw’ when nothing grew except weeds. When a shovel and hoe were the only gardening equipment. When the rains came and came and came and the garden seemed to be a swimming pool not a garden. During this time the vision remained. If in the end the weather and the tractor defeat Isis it shall not make Isis a loser. If the watermelon and blueberries never grow the experience will stay forever. There is only one way to be a failure and that is to decide that you will put your dream away in mothballs. That is failure.

Take control of your life. Begin living your life. Don’t let fear of the unknown cause you to fail. Failure is not an option. Live each day to the fullest.

 

askisis@isistemple.org